Redha's Journal

      Hello. Just a quick post. Two post in one day? Nope, the previous post was written a long time ago but I've haven't press the publish button since today's morning. So this post is about 'Content'. So, I've celebrated my birthday which was few weeks ago. It was fun, quiet birthday, just to my likings. My wife baked me a birthday cake, a cute swiss roll, not too sweet which is my kind of cake. I don't have sweet tooth anymore, all fell out since. Then, my wife asked me what do I want for my birthday which is the toughest question of all. I opened up Amazon so I could find the things that I wanted but I couldn't which is weird because I'm a guy who always find something to buy on Amazon. Two, three days, I've been scrolling through my phone, through the Amazon lists, nothing. Nothing comes to my mind (as most days). It's weird. She gave me a list of choice, ranging from comic books to a freaking VR headset, and I still don't feel like ...

      Howdy. How are ye? This morning, I was bored and I opened up my old posts from 2014 to 2019. At first, I was a bit cringe at my own posts and then it kind of hits me, I was growing up at the time. I was becoming more mature. I was becoming the man I am today. The old posts show how I grew up from a young boy who knows nothing to a grown up who still knows nothing but trying his best.     Back then, I was just having fun, having minimal responsibilities except studying. Now everything in my life is hectic. Coming to work every morning, meetings, doing stuff in the fab (that's what semiconductor industries call production floor), lunch, doing more stuff or meetings, and go home to rest and prepare myself for the next day. It's been like that since we've moved to Ireland. Apart of me sometimes resent myself for moving, but a small part of me glad that we moved here, all the adventures we've had, all the experiences of moving abroad. Sometimes I look...

      For past few weeks, I've been internal monologuing to myself about my life. About what I've accomplished, about how did I get here, about everything that's been happening in my life. It's a weird one. It's not a struggle, it's just a wonder. It's a guessing game. It's a poetic gesture although I have non of poetic traits. Everything in my daily life, I've been thinking about the past. How much fun it is in the past, living close to home, having a simple life, daily struggles, night drive, cafe hunting with my wife, saving up to buy furnitures instead of targeting for the big things. The only thing for me is that I know myself, I know that I'm always looking forward for something big. For something more than what I already have at that point. It's a healthy trait to have, to always challenging yourself but it's not a satisfaction that I could get because of nothing that I want, I get. I want to buy a house. I want to see my parents f...